From the author:
I didn't start out to
write a book, I started out putting together a booklet consisting of the
stories written by family members on what their experiences had been
as they went through the process of having a loved one go into care and
I had noticed that, when a resident
came into a nursing home, you, their relatives, had to go about the process of
learning to be "the family member." Just like the resident, you were usually dropping into a new situation which was confusing and
emotionally taxing, and had to land on your feet running. The problem is that it
takes time to learn the role. You learned slowly,
day by day, and often by making mistakes, or worse, by having something go wrong.
Only later would you learn how you should have handled the problem.
I was just going to write a short
introduction to the booklet when I began to think, maybe I should just
explain this part about being the family member. Then I
thought, well, maybe it would be helpful if I explained this too . The book
grew from there.
So, this book will teach you how to be
the family member of someone in care. This is what I hope:
hope it increases your learning curve so that you feel more adequate
faster and able to negotiate the system in which you find yourself.
hope it helps you to get the best care possible for the person you love.
hope it will help you avoid feeling helpless and avoid having something
happen which could be prevented.
I hope it helps you to
have a better experience of what you are going through.
I hope it helps you to help your relative through this
experience, from the first time you think about it until you leave the
nursing home for the last time.
I hope it helps you understand how and why nursing home
systems work the way they do.
I hope it helps you to cope with what you are going through
emotionally and understand how that affects you and your relative.
I hope it helps you to see what things look like from the
point of view of the people who work in nursing homes.
I hope it gives you courage, strength, and solace, and helps
your compassion to grow.
I hope all this isn't too much to hope for.
Best wishes to you.
You can reach me at my company office, in Vancouver, BC.
Canada at 604-874-7764. or email me at email@example.com